Statebeach

Aunt Betty on RMM and TFC

2009-11-04T15:56:00.000-08:00

hi aunt Betty & uncle Sam,

was wondering if you could solve a family question for us.

I have a gold ring that is inscribed:

"TFC to RMM, 1907"

this is presumably from my great-grandfather Thomas F. Crosby Jr. to
my great-grandmother Ruth M. McMahon (Crosby). JP doesn't know what
Ruth's middle name was. I assume "Mae" like Ruth Mae, but we thought
you guys might know.

maybe you even remember the ring - it's a simple solid 18k gold
number, no adornments, very nice.

do you know what year they got married? do you remember when AT
McKash came on the scene?

thanks!

Hi Scott, and Brett
I would love to help you with the mystery of the ring, but I can only guess. I would assume that a gold ring would be a wedding
ring. Could it be your great grand dad T.F.C. (Thomas F(.) Fulton Crosby) marrying Ruth Mae McMahon? 1907 sounds about right. Then Ruth Mae (oldest?) and Tom Sr. would have been born in there somewhere. Lucille was born in 1915. J.P. should know when his dad was born, maybe 1913? Lucille and Tom were married March 3, 1939 (they were engaged for 5 years). I
was 13 and remember they bought a house in North Long Beach,(on Magnolia Ave.) near Tom Sr's mom, Mrs. McCash (McKash?). When Tom Jr. (your Dad) was born, I used to baby sit him at that house. He was so cute!
They had a big Chow dog. Sam thinks it was named Ming. Tom's sister, Ruth Mae, lived with her mom then.
Ruth Mae was crazy about Sam (we called Sam Crosby then (his middle name). Ruth Mae and all my family were so happy when we got married. You have to realize that we had known each other since our early teens.

As I remember, Mrs. McCash was a big smoker, but so was everyone including my Dad. My mom never smoked or drank alcohol and Tom Sr. used to sneak some booz into a pitcher of lemonade or whatrever. My mom, Anna was so sweet
and nice that she didn't say much but we all knew she didn't like it. J.P. was born later, in 1946(?) when they moved to Belmont Shore. He actually was c;uter than Tom Jr. and almost won the cutest award until Brett came along. Now I think Lindy has the cutest crown for sure!!! Sorry Scott, I didn't mean to exclude you. This is the historical trivia for now.
Lots of Love,
Aunt Betty
P.S. Scott, we still need to look at your old photo's.

Dad's 300D

2009-03-22T18:30:00.000-07:00

In 1978 Dad brought home a brand-new Mercedes 300D, magnolia yellow with "mbtex" faux leather interior. I remember my friend Steve jumping in when he brought it home and saying "wow! leather and stick shift!" ...Both wrong, but dad didn't correct him.

I still drive that car and will always have it. It's got 178,000 miles and is nearly perfect. I love it and sold my Porsche and Audi, they don't compare.

Kuelap

2006-10-10T10:44:00.000-07:00

When Tom and I were in the Peace Corps in Peru, we had several weeks a
year to take vacation time. During our second year, we had decided to
go to Brazil, which we could actually afford after saving for two
years from our $100/month/volunteer stipend. Best laid plans,
however, could not compete with a huelga general (general strike),
which affected all forms of public transportation. Somehow, we made
it to Lima from Arequipa and set out for an incountry trip instead.
We had heard of and were able to contact Gene Savoy, the intrepid
Andean explorer, and after getting directions and very little else, we
set out by auto, mule and foot to the jungles of Peru. I think we had
hiking shoes, hats, backpacks with sleeping bags, iodine tablets,
oranges and a stash of Sublimes, a Peruvian chocolate bar. We hooked
up with a guide and eventually found our way to the newly "discovered"
ruins of Kuelap (or Quelap). The site was just being excavated and it
was pretty exciting to be in on the early stages of this remarkable
fortress city-state. Your dad loved such adventures and was a very
accommodating travel partner. The only thing I remember being in
conflict about was the new Kodad Super 8 movie camera, a gift from
Grandma and Grandpa Crosby. Each of us wanted to do the filming, but
neither wanted to carry it, at least, not for long. I think it
eventually travelled on the back of the mule.

Kuelap was in the news the other day, and is apparently a major tourist site.

Takin' the kids to school

2006-09-01T00:27:00.000-07:00

Shown at 37 here, dad was really enthusiastic as a parent. Back in the 70s he drove a cool Datsun 260Z, sliver with black interior, that smelled exotic and powerful to a kid. I remember the clock in particular, a "Jeco", that had this cool mod Japanese style to it. Dad was really physically strong in his 30s/40s, and didn't become really weak until his late 50s.

1-11-70

2006-07-16T09:43:00.000-07:00

The day Scott was born. We rushed to the hospital around 2 am, your
dad grabbing my already packed suitcase which included a yellow
layette, as in those days, noone knew what sex the baby would be. We
arrived a South Coast Community hospital in good time, the only
complication being that the Super Bowl was that day and both Tom and
Dr. White wanted me to hurry so they could see the game. You and I
tried to accommodate them, and you were born easily and well before
the kickoff. However, I was the only one to see the game, as your dad
and your grandparents were at the viewing window watching you sleep
for most of the game. I can't remember who played whom, but for a
couple of days, Tom threatened to name you after the winning
quarterback if we couldn't make a decision. As you know, a compromise
was eventually reached, thus the reason for four names.

PREQUEL: The night before, we were in an underground parking lot
after a UCLA basketball game, caught in the exit crowd, with the gas
gauge on empty. You were due on the 10th, and I was pretty nervous
that we'd not make it out of the garage, let alone home. Tom never
was one to worry about how much was left in the tank when it read
empty. I think he took it as a personal challenge to never run out of
gas, in any car, regardless of the risk.

Yesterday was Dad's birthday

2006-06-05T08:27:00.000-07:00

Well, yesterday was Dad's birthday. As Patty remembered to mention
over email, Dad would have pointed out as he always did, "Today is
June 4th, the most important day of the year!"

In honor of Dad, I spent his birthday tinkering around the house on
various projects, sitting on my deck, drinking some wine and even
watching a little golf.

--Brett

Ski Trips

2006-05-08T20:52:00.000-07:00

Dad really tried hard to make family ski trips fun, and amazingly never lost his composure, even when being yelled at by Brett for his culpability in Brett's recent crash or inability to close the latch on his second-hand ski boot. And Dad thought we looked good in early 80s ski-wear. I suppose he was right.

Now I have to thank him, as both Brett and I will always be solid skiers, since he started us so young. The first trip was to Beaver, Utah, using $7 skis we bought at a garage sale. I think it was this trip that saw the coining of the immortal term "self-sufficiency on the slopes!" as a defense to another Brett tantrum.

But blaming one's parents for any sort of embarrassment is not unique to young Brett, as was well illustrated in the case of Sean Kelley, yellow pants, a parrot-print shirt, and a full tray of Laughlin buffet food...

-SC

The Gaithers

2006-05-07T23:59:00.000-07:00

Dad's favorite music in his later years was gospel, particularly the
Gaithers. Kind of funny from a relentlessly secular guy, but yeah,
he listened to them every day pretty much. He was never opposed to
the Stanford fight song -- "All Right Now" by Free -- or the Beach
Boys, or his all-time favorite "Trickle Trickle" by the Manhattan
Transfer, but in his last 10 years, it was all about the christian
tunes, meaning be damned.

-SC

354 Orlena

2006-05-07T09:49:00.000-07:00

My grandmother, Lucille Crosby, was an amazing woman. Among many other impressive accomplishments, she designed and oversaw the construction of the Crosby family house at 354 Orlena, across from the Colorado Lagoon, in Long Beach. Directly across the street is what is now known as the Crosby Green Space. From there Dad, Brett, and I would often take a bucket of TFC Sr.'s old golf balls (another story) and whack them into the lagoon. I think Dad was always a little disappointed we weren't natural golf talents, but we did manage to get the occasional nice shot off. From paintings Dad did when I was a little kid, I know his fantasy was to have a golf prodigy for a kid, but alas, we were neither that nor great tennis or piano players. The paintings show me carrying a golf club much taller than myself, which I'm sure gave him visions of a Tiger Woods-like rise to PGA greatness. Sorry about that Dad.

Anyway, when Grandma died (which devastated him, another story for later) Brett and I tried to prevail upon Dad and JP to keep the house, but Dad was adamant that he didn't want to be a landlord. JP was sort of indifferent, preferring that someone from the family live there if we were to keep it. In the end it was sold for a pittance ($350k maybe?) and the new owners proceeded to tear it down and build a massive McMansion on the site, right up to the property line on all sides. A hideous monster. I think that really depressed Dad, as it erased so many great memories and his last real connection to his parents. I know it really made me sad. But I learned a lesson -- never sell real estate you care about. The new owners can never be trusted, so only sell if you want to make a buck, but couldn't care less if it's razed the next day, as it likely will be.

-SC

Ol' Yeller

2006-05-07T09:27:00.000-07:00

In 1978, when he was 38, Dad bought his first-ever new car (I think the 260 Z was used, could be wrong) [editor's note - click on the comment below for corrections to this]. It was a Mercedes 300D, in magnolia yellow, purchased from the now-defunct Jim Slemons Mercedes. Dad believed in giving cars the utmost in care and maintenance, and he kept it in near-perfect condition. Over the years he tried to pawn it off on us after we got old enough to drive, but it was so slow we always declined. Thank god, we would have destroyed it. All those years it sat unmolested in the garage, occasionally driven, and from time to time Dad would make noises about getting rid of it or one of us taking it to San Diego. I always refused on the grounds that it would be a shame to leave it outside, after so many years of being garaged. Finally, I got my own house in Pacific Beach (with a garage), and took the car off Patty's hands in 2006. It's my mission to keep it in perfect condition, but to drive it, as it's a great car for just about anything but going fast. People are blown away by the condition of the interior, which is 99% flawless, with not a single crack or discoloration. Car washes implore me to make sure it is always kept indoors, and be very careful with it, which is funny. If they only knew how long we've been benevolently ignoring it, they wouldn't be too worried. I will drive that car forever. Dad would like that.

-SC

The purpose of this blog is...

2006-05-07T09:25:00.000-07:00

...to get down memories of Dad as they surface in our unreliable, uncatalogued brains. Submissions will come from the yout's (Scott, Brett, Julie, and hopefully computerphobe Tera), as well as those of the previous generation (Patty, Sharon, JP, and his friends and legal colleagues). The idea is to capture stories and snapshots of quintessential Dad without a lot of time commitment or hassle. Hopefully this becomes a substantial archive of material that illustrates the greatness and extremely idiosyncratic nature of Thomas F. Crosby, Jr.

-SC (Scott Crosby=SC, Brett Crosby=BC, Patty Crosby=PC, Sharon Wasserman=SW, DB=Dick Bonner, etc.)